Credit: Epic Games

Anger, assault & addiction: Klombos are not who you think they are

Klombos: cute, loveable creatures or evil, vindictive abusers?

Most people only see the light side of Klombo. A brief scroll through Reddit or Twitter will show you their adorable smile and puppy-dog-eyes, but there’s something more sinister lingering beneath the surface.

The reality is this: Klombos are berry-addicted, mean-spirited abusers. They take  everything you have without a word of thanks, only to turn on you the second you fire a shot in their direction.

To make matters worse, Klombo apologists engage in some of the most aggressive gaslighting and victim blaming of any community on the internet.

It’s time that we told the other side of the story.

Addiction and potential drug smuggling

Let’s start with the root of most of these problems – an epidemic that has been sweeping the island ever since Chapter 3 released.

More and more harmful, addictive substances have entered the island since it flipped. Whether you’re huffing Med Mist, doing Shield Keg stands, or slamming Guzzle Juice, you’ve undoubtedly encountered the new crop of drugs that have taken the island by storm.

Is it any coincidence that these narcotics set the stage for Fortnite’s biggest druggies? These guys will inhale anything you put in front of them, but especially love their Klomberries – a powerful hallucinogen that is said to be the source of the Klombo’s invulnerability.

Fortnite has always had a drug problem, but Klombo and his allies have ushered in a new wave of stronger, more addictive substances. We can only speculate about how these drugs will affect the psyche of the island’s residents.



Anger management

Yes, Klombos are cute and precious, but they have a hair-trigger that makes Raptors look like Chickens.

One wrong look – one misfire – and Klombos are out for blood.

When you consider the fact that the Fortnite Gods are mandating that we deal damage to these violent beasts, it’s clear to see that they’re fostering a culture of abuse and victim-blaming, which leads into our next point – the allegations of abuse.

Assault allegations

Ever since Klombo arrived on the island, reports of abuse have skyrocketed.

These gentle giants take on an entirely new persona when they get angry, which has led to violent incidents all over the Fortnite island.

Many of us know someone who has been affected by these actions, but Klombos are never held accountable. Look at any video evidence of such abuse and you’ll see some of the most disgusting victim-blaming on the internet.

Sadly, few victims have a chance to tell their whole story. Klombos will either shut them up themselves or hire a Stinger-wielding assassin to do their work for them.

It’s a truly sad state of affairs, and Klombo apologists directly contradict the reality that so many of us have faced. The gaslighting and victim-blaming is second to none within the Klombo fandom.

It’s disgusting. Just look what happened to Bruce.

If you or a loved one has been affected by Klombo, please contact us. We want to tell your story, even if Big Klombo doesn’t want it out there.

You can leave your story in the comments, or contact me directly on Twitter if you have video evidence: @JimmyDangus. 

There’s power in numbers, and they can’t ignore the countless voices of those affected by Klombos every day. Stay safe out there.